Building Your Self-Esteem

I used to worry so much about a lot of things in my life, my career, family, future, relationships and other basic necessities of life...there were times I would worry so much about people who didn't even care about me, I devoted my time to things not worthy of it, I gave wrong people the right pieces of me, I did things for people and expect them to do it in return for me. And some days in my journey everything goes backward instead of forward, sometimes I question a lot of things about myself, some days I feel as though no one gets me, understands me, or even cares about me, I would worry myself so hard and even go to bed feeling upset. Yeah! And before I knew it, slowly and gradually, my self-esteem was being eating up, it started destroying my confidence as a young lady and my outlook on life.

But look I said to myself one day that it's time to look at things differently again! I decided to silence the voice in my head that told me I was not good enough, and then hearing God whisper into my heart, stop striving! Stop seeking after things that others have, stop doing so much and just learn to be! You need to love yourself first before you can get anything done in this world. Did you hear that? Listen guys, you absolutely cannot make everyone happy, so stop trying! Love yourself and value yourself because true love does not come from people but from God. Real happiness comes from being content with and proud of yourself. Society may expect certain things from us, yet we are the ones who choose whether or not we internalize those things and make them our own, but you are you and that's a beautiful thing. 
You need to also know that you are not the mistake you might have made. I remember feeling there was nothing special about me that made me unique but going through part of some process, finally realizing it doesn't really matter. Life isn't about the living happily ever after, it’s not about winning popularity contents, it’s about your journey to happiness and fulfilling God's will for yourself. "I wish I could go back and tell my teenage self that I was beautiful. But since I can't, I'm going to say it to you all; every single one of you is unique, beautiful and worthy of a great life." - Demi Lovato 
I have been working so hard on myself lately and it's pretty tough and cool too because not everyone is understanding it. But see my dear, it’s very much okay to live a life others don't understand. You can't just sit down there and put everyone's life ahead of yours and think that counts as love. Do not shrink yourself for someone's comfort, do not become small for people who refuse to grow.  Honestly speaking I do that before, I would inconvenience myself to make others comfortable but at the end of the day I end up empty. But I don't care anymore. 
               "You should not have to rip yourself into pieces to keep others whole." -Mandy Hale. 
You may begin to ask yourself, so how do I get myself out of this? How can I gain back my confidence and self esteem?

  →It all starts from knowing who you are and knowing what you are called here to do
→Then start to appreciate yourself, don't wait for somebody to validate your existence. Go out, live, give yourself the best things in life. You will have to treat yourself right before someone else can treat you right.
→ Drop your worries, worry puts a burden on your mind, body, and spirit. They can keep you up all night if you let them. Find comfort in the fact that everything will fall into place at the right time.
→Write down goals you want to achieve in life, both long and short term ones.
→Start taking risks and do things that lead you towards fulfilling that goal.
→Don’t ever care what people think about you, as long as you know what you are doing is right and it's not hurting anyone.Believe in your path.
→Smile, eat well, dress well, speak properly, clearly and audible too.
→Develop your gifts and talents.
→Let go of friends who do not respect you or like you for you.
→Be nice and kind to people but let them know when they step on your toes.
→Understand that it is not healthy to let others walk all over you and use you anyhow, this is a big problem if you're shy or the type of person who really likes to please people just like me. Voice out! Don't die in silence!
→ Ask for help or talk to someone you trust if you're in a bad mood or facing a challenge. If you don't take care of yourself and your emotional health, you could make bad decisions that you'll regret later.
→Work hard, I mean real hard and stay humble.
→Surround yourself with positive people.
→Practice looking at yourself in the mirror daily saying, I love you and I can do great things.
→Be yourself and always look good, embrace what you were born with and don't try to fit in.

1 comment

  1. I find this so inspirational...working on my self esteem too and this post is helpful!


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